Gecko on speed.
Today I got in the truck and turned out of my driveway, sipping coffee, like I always do. As I reached around 40 mph, I watched through my windshield as an (initially) sleepy-looking lizard wander out of his hidey-hole beneath the windshield wipers, and onto the hood of the truck. YOU GUYS-I SAW THE EXACT MOMENT THAT HE REALIZED THAT HE WAS ON THE HOOD OF A TRUCK GOING 40 MILES PER FUCKING HOUR, and it was not pretty. Because this realization never is; you've been asleep and missed some important content leading up to it. Alas, there is no time to be too upset about it, to deliberate, to re-process, to take painful looks at all of the steps leading up to it, it springs us into action...or maybe it doesn't and we crawl back into our hidey-hole of devices (and vices) and distractions only to emerge bewildered yet again, yet another day.
So after pulling over and releasing my panicked buddy into a new wild a couple of miles up the road, I took the rest of my drive to work to reflect on the people, places, things, and experiences that have been there for me when I've woken up on something that was entirely too large going entirely too fast. So, to all of the people, all of you people (because you know who you are) who have helped me along the way, when I've woken up and realized that everything is just ever so slightly completely out of control. To the friends who've sat before me, or on the other end of a string, tin can pressed into their ear, who have seen me in that moment of terror, and helped me take a deep breath, or just sat with me as I've cried (or laughed, or insert any other weird behavior here). The desert, the mountains, the ocean, the weird situations that happened along the way. I'm grateful to all of it because you were there (or even weren't there); I didn't get off, it didn't slow down, and it didn't get smaller. I'm here, I'm on it and we are doing this thing, and I couldn't have done it without you guys. So thanks. (Right, it is pretty vague...because I don't even know what it is yet, I just know it's happening and it's fucking awesome.)
P.S. wake me up if something cool or weird happens.